Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Qu'est-ce que Cela Peut Faire...?

It's better to be looked over than overlooked. -Mae West

See that quote above? For all my love of Mae West and her back-in-the-day-female-playya awesomeness, that quote is LIES. Romance is probably the single most confusing and terrifying thing I, and probably most other people, have encountered in their lives. And yet, for some insane, masochistic reason that baffles the world, WE CRAVE IT. Sure, it's probably animal sex-drive, but that's what hookers are for! (I am joking, don't worry.)

Either way, when we know that it's all so confusing and infuriating and painful, why do we always seek out new romantic situations? Why do we crave them when we don't have them? WHAT IS THE PULL?!? Sure, it's awesome when it's going well, but the other 99% of the time, romance/love/whatever is absolutely baffling. Now that may be my general lack of common social skills and sense speaking, but I think I'm onto something. Being probably the only consequence-obsessed person in the country (well, not really, but you get the idea) I find romantic situations to be a minefield of possible fuck-ups, where each potential consequence is no more likely than the next. And why? Because people are DAMN CONFUSING. Therefore, no matter what you do, you basically have the same chance of fucking up. Unless it's something really, really dumb, like thinking it's romantic to jump at your partner while they're sleeping while wearing a gorilla suit or nailing them with a supersoaker when they least expect it--BUT MOST PEOPLE DON'T DO THAT. Though I think relationships would be easier to figure out if they did. Can't you see the conversations?
"Tony just jumped at me in a gorilla suit yesterday--it scared the shit out of me!"
"Oh my God, it must be love!"
Feel free to vomit now. But I think it would be pretty damn funny. Nobody buys flowers anymore anyway (unless they've done something wrong..?). Gorilla suits and water guns are WAY more romantic.

The most baffling thing of all is that we have very little control over our own feelings. Why else would we love people who are bad to us, or be hesitant about what would definitely be a much better relationship? Is it insanity in attraction? Or is it just plain old overwhelmed-ness and confusion because stuff always seems to happen at the speed of light and there's never much reaction time? [I'm voting for the second option.]

Either way, love is confusing. Feelings are confusing. Life is confusing. Currently, I am one seriously confused bitch, and it's not just about romance. This summer work is going to eat my brains for breakfast. Little do my teachers know that I'm doing my book report on
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.

[I have no idea what I'm going to do.]

So how do you feel? Shoot me a comment.

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